World Economics Made Simple

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TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.

CHINESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity
and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.

INDIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You worship them.

PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
You don't have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid, China for military
aid, Britain for warplanes, Italy for machines,
Germany for technology, France for submarines,
Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan
for equipment.
You buy the cows with all this and claim
exploitation by the world.

AMERICAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the
milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
You put the blame on some nation with cows &
naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind.
You wage war to save the world and grab the cows.

FRENCH ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

GERMAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so that they live for 100
years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

BRITISH ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
They are both mad.

ITALIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.

SWISS ECONOMICS
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

JAPANESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the
size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times
the milk.
You then create cute cartoon cow images called
COWKIMON and market them worldwide.

RUSSIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
You give up counting and open another bottle of
vodka.

MALAYSIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You slaughter one for Hari Raya Puasa and the
other for Hari Raya Haji.
Just before that, both the cows were wandering
along the PLUS Highways.

PHILIPPINE ECONOMICS
You have only one cow.
So the government claims there is a shortage of
cows.
The government ask grants from other countries so
the country can produce more cows.
The other countries oblige.
The government divides the grants among
themselves, and blames the opposition of
corruption.
The people stage People Power 42.
The government is overthrown.
Then its back to the single cow.
source:got from a forwarded e-mail.


Paalam Buwan ng Wika!!

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Ang Buwan ng Agosto ay ang pag-gunita sa kaarawaan ni Pangulong Manuel L. Quezon, ang Ama ng Wikang Pambansa. Karaniwang nagkakaisa ang buong bansa sa okasyong ito. Binibigyang-diin ang pagmamahal sa ating wika. Pinahahalagahan at pinayayaman pa natin ito. Nakikiisa ang mga Pilipino sa paggamit ng Filipino sa pagpupulong, sa pagsulat, at sa talakayan.

At pagtatapos ng buwang ito ay nais kung magbigay pahalaga sa pamamagitan ng isang hamon sa ating lahat na bagamat nasa ibayong dagat tayo ay atin pa ring tangkilikin ito at gamitin. Ang inyong lingkod sa kasalukuyang nag-mumunimuni kung anong katha, paksa ng sulatin ang gagawin bilang pagpupugay sa ating sariling wika.

Ang inyong mungkahi ay akin pong inaanyayahan.

"I prefer a country run like hell by Filipinos to a country run like heaven by Americans. Because, however bad a Filipino government might be, we can always change it."
Manuel Luis Quezon

at ngayo'y Pilipino na ang namamahala, sana di pa huli ang lahat...


Break, Its Joketime!

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Got this from an e-mail forwarded by a friend...

A filipino man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said the man, "Whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible," said the man.

"And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Gloria Macapagal Arroyo's clock?" asked the man. The Philippine President's' clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Postscript:
As for me, I bet where's the senator's', congressmen's, militants' & politician's' clocks are? I had a good guess, it's in the kitchens and mess halls..They are used as exhaust fans as well and some are fitted as lawn mowers blades. hehehe.. How's that, a good deduction right?


Make-over!

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Since the creation of this blog, it undergone many make-overs and probably more to come..

Now it has more features like the Latest Philippine News at the right top and the Breaking News Links from Yahoo. & Inq.7 thanks to the new web technology.

Also it has a Forex Currency Converter and World Time Links to serve you and for enhanced browsing.

And the usual interactions like the Shoutbox and Comments section.

We are hoping to serve you better..
Thank you for surfing by..

Desertpinoys..( wala pa akong tulog)


Nabugnot si Cabagnot

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Fil-Am playmaker Alex Cabagnot alledgedly left the country after contract negotiations with Sta. Lucia Realty failed. Sources said ,he decided instead to finish his Physical Education degree at the University of Hawaii-Hilo.

Consequences

"If there's malice on his (Cabagnot) intentions, the league will definitely come down hard on him," Eala told the Inquirer.

According to league rules, Cabagnot will have to sit out for a year but could re-apply for the draft next season.

The Realtors could either trade their rights on Cabagnot or forfeit their hold on the NCAA Division 2 player from the UH-Hilo the following season.

No easy way out

But the Realtors are not letting Cabagnot off the hook easily with team governor and former PBA chairman Buddy Encarnado batting for a lifetime ban on the rookie being touted as someone better than Barangay Ginebra's Marc Caguioa.

"That kid should be taught a lesson," said Encarnado. "You just can't shake the hand of a man after an agreement has been forged and later tell him that you've changed you're mind."


Sheez, don't we have a local talent who is willing to play for a fair salary. What I don't like about these Fil-Ams is they haven't proven themselves yet and they are bitchin' like they are some NBA hot shot. Now don't you want Rudy Distrito welcome this kid in the league? Anyway, let's wait for further development.


Bring in the Chinese

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GMA tapped HK-graft buster Tony Kwok Wan-Mai as her special adviser on anti-corruption. According to him the Philippines is no mission impossible.

"So, some people think fighting corruption in the Philippines is like being handed a poisoned chalice, do they? Well, I guess they haven't been to Nigeria then."


The Battle Plan


""There is no shortage of political will to fight corruption here in the Philippines. From the President down to her Cabinet ministers and heads of government departments, you have the will. Ordinary Filipinos are fed up with it as well."

"You must have a legal system that is prepared to take the cases on, process them quickly and see that wrongdoers are jailed.

..the anti-corruption agencies, such as the Office of the Ombudsman, must have the tools to fight.


The Skeptics

"Comparing the Philippines to Hong Kong is just ludicrous," one diplomat said.

"Hong Kong was ruled by the British and had the rule of law. What do you have here? You have a group of rich families and vested interests looking after one another ... Everyone is on the take and that's just the way it is."


Good luck Tony on your crusade, I hope you start with your Boss and her family.


Now Showing:Runaway Inday

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Number of runaway Filipino maids doubles
excertps from Gulf News..
read more..

The number of runaway maids seeking shelter at the Philippine Labour Office in Dubai has doubled in a month, from the usual rate of 30 plus to more than 60, straining the shelter's capacity.

Vicente M. Cabe, labour attache at the Philippine Consulate General, told Gulf News the reason for the increase was due "to a combination of many factors".

He said it could mean that more Filipinos were aware of their rights and know where to go when they got into trouble.

"Maybe they know that we can help send them home," he said.

Another was that many cases were not being resolved timely enough to accommodate newcomers at the shelter, he added.

Other reasons included the growing Filipino population in the UAE. Consulate figures placed the number of Filipino expatriates in the country at more than 200,000, with the figure growing at one per cent monthly.

Whatever the reason, Cabe said the Consulate General was concerned over the increasing number of runaway maids seeking help.

"It's always alarming to us whenever there is an increase," he said.

Cabe said the most common complaints the office received from the maids were unpaid wages and mistreatment.

"tabi-tabi po, bato-bato sa langit ang tamaan 'wag magagalit."


Sharjah Slasher: GUILTY!

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Justice served

SHARJAH - Jude Pereira, the 28-year-old Sri Lankan nicknamed the "Sharjah Slasher" after he went on a stabbing spree assaulting four women between February 12 and 17, was sentenced by the Sharjah Shariah Court to two-year imprisonment besides a fine of Dh2,000 yesterday, a little over five months after he was arrested.

Unrepentant or Wacko?

Jude heard the sentence being read out with a smile on his face, while back home in Sri Lanka, his father, K.D. Peter Pereira, choked on his son's plight, saying it was a sad day for the family.

Clad casually in denims and white shirt, Jude, sporting a beard, appeared to have lost weight, but the smile never left his face as he watched the proceedings from behind the fence.

Duh!

SHARJAH - Jude Pereira himself provided the punch line when Khaleej Times reporter spoke to him after the court handed him down the sentence.

"Do you hate women?" Jude was asked, and pat came the reply "Yes".

"And do you love women?"

Jude said with a smile "No."


No More Ban?

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On re-entering the UAE that is. If you quit your job and cancel your visa you can still enter the UAE...

But...

Lt Col Al Khidhar said foreign workers leaving their jobs will no longer have an entry ban stamped on their passports, enabling them to re-enter the country on any type of visa, other than employment

However...

However, according to the new rule, if an employee has been banned by the labour ministry, he cannot work in the UAE during the ban period, but can enter the country nevertheless as a tourist.

Yeah, you guess it right the article got me too. I thought it will be happy days.



Got an e-mail from a friend. Hope this may also interest you(its worth voting for).

Did you know that the Philippines' coconut geotextile (coconet) for soil
erosion control has been chosen as one of the 12 finalists in Newsweek and BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) World Challenge? The World Challenge is basically a competition/search designed at identifying groups or individuals all over the world whose projects have contributed great impact at grass roots level.

A documentary about Philippine Coconut geotextile or coconet industry will be shown on the BBC World cable channel on September 24 around 8:30 GMT and will also be featured in the August 29 special issue of Newsweek.

The World Challenge already offers a tremendous exposure and publicity to our flourishing Philippine coconut geotextile industry and to our Philippine coconut fiber exporters.

To vote, please open
http://www.theworldchallenge.co.uk and click the picture of Philippine coconet.

Please help us campaign for more voters by forwarding this message to
your co-worker, friends and relatives. Voting is open until 16 October 2005.


I Love You, Filipini !

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I love you Filipini
You have such exotic beauty

I love you Filipini
You're so tiny and cuddly

I love you Filipini
Oh you're so sexy

I love you Filipini
I'm sure you'll take care of me

I love you Filipini
You ask so little money

I love you Filipini
You like cheap jewelry

I love you Filipini
Even after five kids you can still fit in my Camry

I love you Filipini
Marry me, I can't afford a dowry

I love you Filipini
Be my Habibti

I love you Filipini
Don't resist I'm C.#.*. (whatever)

*Filipini or Pilipini - the arab way of pronouncing Filipino.


Para kay Flor

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Wag kuya, wag kuya
Nandito ako kasi wala kaming kaya

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Wag mo akong pasuin ng plantsa

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Hindi sinasadya mabasag ang tasa

Wag kuya, wag kuya
May asawa't anak ka na

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Baka madatnan tayo ng iyong asawa

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Katatapos lang ng anak mo at yung sumunod sa kanya

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Hindi ako donselya, ako lang ay nireregla

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Sige na, mahal na rin kita

Wag kuya, wag kuya
Hindi ko sinasadyang mapatay kita


A Visa to Dubai

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A visa to Dubai will make you smile
After all this is what you have been dreaming for a while

A visa to Dubai means education for your children
A dream you have since way back then

A visa to Dubai can build you a house
Now you can move out from the ancestral home of your spouse

A visa to Dubai means gold for Nanay
Shoes for Tatay, perfume for Inday

A visa to Dubai can find you a rich guy
One that can provide for your Inay and Itay

Yet a visa to Dubai can make you cry
Paying 60K to a relative just so you can fly

With a visa to Dubai you can be Inday
Then you can send money for your lazy husband's pantagay

A visa to Dubai can give you a baby
From a guy who has wives oh so many

Everyone wants a visa to Dubai
Smile or cry, bahala na! 'Pinas goodbye!

So I ask, are you willing to fly?
Come and buy a visa to Dubai


Words of a Martyr

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Burning the Candle of My Life
By Benigno 'Ninoy' Aquino, Jr.

I am burning the candle of my life
in the dark with no one to benefit
from its light.
The candle slowly melts away
soon its wick will be burned out,
and the light is gone.


If someone will only gather
the melted wax, reshape it,
give it a new wick
for another fleeting moment
my candle can once again
light the dark
be of service
one more time
and then...


Goodbye.


-------------------------------

Kung walang makikinig sa iyo,
kung walang sasama sa iyo
sa iyong dakilang pagkilos
dahil sanay na sila sa pagiging alipin
maglakad ka pa rin,
pasanin mo pa rin ang krus ng bayan
kahit na mag-isa kang naglalakad!


The Fall of the 2 Maids?

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Can you spot the difference or there is no difference at all? It's for you to decide..

(actual news article from Gulf News)

Maid plunges to her death from flat on seventh floor

18/8/2005 Abu Dhabi:A Filipina housemaid plunged to her death from a tower building in the city centre yesterday, police sources said.

Police said she fell from a seventh floor apartment of a building on Istiqlal Street. Residents told Gulf News the accident happened at about noon and the woman died on the spot.

When contacted, there was no response from the family she worked for. However, residents believe the woman slipped and fell while working on the balcony of the apartment.

The Philippines Embassy said she was aged 34. end

Yun lang po ang sabi nila.(ngyeek)

Housemaid dies after jumping from 15th floor

13/7/2005 Sharjah: A 24-year-old Filipina housemaid died after jumping from a 15th floor window of a building in Sharjah, a police source said.
Police said the incident happened at about 2pm last Wednesday at a building in Al Nahda opposite the Sahara Centre.

According to police investigations the housemaid jumped from the window of her room following a dispute with the family she worked for.


The Lebanese family told police the maid had to look after their four-year-old child and the child had told his mother the maid had beaten him. The maid was shouted at and she locked herself in her room.

The housewife's husband was called to help in the dispute. When he reached home he saw a woman's body had been covered up by police outside their building. It was the housemaid's body.

An Indonesian housemaid, who works in the same building, said she used to see the Filipina housemaid playing with the child under the building.

Another Filipina housemaid in the same building said she had heard the housemaid had been having financial problems and was unhappy.

"She worked for the family for one year in this building. I think she used to work for them before they came here but I'm not sure," she said.

Police are investigating the case to find out the reason behind her death, they added the maid was not on the family's sponsorship. end


Philippine Embassy/OWWA-POLO, whats your status report? (wala siguro)

"To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men" Abraham Lincoln


Bayanihan in the Desert

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As the lyrics of 'Apl Song' from the famous Black Eyed Peas goes..

Everyone helpin' each other whenever they can
We makin' it happen, from nothin' to somethin'
That's how we be survivin' back in my homeland


Once again bayanihan is in the hearts and minds of our community leaders in Dubai. They plan to set up a charity foundation for our kababayans here in the UAE that are in need.

"The money we raise will go to people with serious illnesses like cancer, for example. Also Filipinos who were abused by their employers or do not have enough money to go back home," she said at the sidelines of the monthly community leaders meeting at the Consulate General of the Philippines, yesterday.


This is a for worthy cause, so instead of buying now a celphone slash digital camera slash mp3 player slash radio slash video game, maybe you can postpone it by a month or two and donate a portion of it to our needy kababayans. Or you can just give your beer money.

I hate to quote Erap but here it goes...

"Walang tutulong sa Pilipino, kundi kapwa Pilipino"


Etisalat finds Friendster.com friendly again

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After months of being blocked, Friendster.com is available to the UAE again. Apparenty, Etisalat recieved a lot of complaints against the site because the usual reasons.."it is inconsistent with the religious, cultural, political and moral values of the UAE"

Etisalat said yesterday it has unblocked friendster.com, a popular online community that connects people across the globe. Officials said the site had been blocked or "proxy filtered" after some of its users had posted obscene messages and pictures.

"We have received numerous complaints from our customers regarding this [the obscenities]. On contacting the administrators of the site in question, eCompany failed to receive any feedback on the same," said Abdulla Hashim, a senior manager at Etisalat's Internet arm, eCompany


We would to like thank Etisalat for unblocking such harmless site like Friendster. For the users of Friendster please refrain from posting obscene pictures...like your geeky high school photos..


The Tales of the Flat-Nosed Sheikhas

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Coming from land of poverty and hardship. Working like slaves in a foreign land far away from home. Meeting the 'love' of her life that forever changed her fortunes. This is the tale of the flat-nosed Sheikah.

After working for so many years in Dubai she met someone who can finally get her out of her misery. She had been around, I think she had the United Nations on her bag. This time she hit the jackpot, she manage to bag a rich, powerful Arab guy. He provided her the business where she can be the boss, a first during her lifetime. Yet power and greed went up her head as fast as she dropped her panties. She enslaved her compatriots working in his company. Sweet promises were made when she took the poor bastards from their hometown. Promising wealth and fortunes in the land of Black Gold. Yet when the workers arrived they were paid so dire that even the poor back home has a better life. Deducting all expenses she could think of. Madam Sheikah always reminded her slave that they are are forever in debt of gratitude to her for bringing them here. So the slaves have no choice but to sit it out here and make ends meet with the salary they received. And so Madam became a full pledge Sheikha, or is she? It turned out that our little bitch was just..well...just one of the bitches of this Arab guy.
That is the tale of our Flat-Nosed Sheikha.

Going home to our native land is what we look forward to always. We get excited to see our forsaken country we call home. Although before we reach in promise land, there's no shortage in amusement in the airport and plain alone. Dubai airport, enroute to Manila is the best place to find our Flat-Nosed Sheikha. This is her story..


Woman: Uy kabayan kailan ka pa dito sa Dubai? (How long have you been here in Dubai?)

Flat-nosed Sheikha: Matagal na ako dito. (I've been here for a long time.)

Woman: Muka nga, kasi dami mong alahas, siguro maganda trabaho mo dito. (Looks, like it. You have to much jewelry, maybe you have a good job here.)

Flat-nosed Sheikha: Ahh ito bigay ito ng Arabo ko. Nuka day kung gusto mong umunlad mag Papa ka ng Arabo. (Oh this one? it was given to me by my Arab 'friend'. If you want to make it here, get yourself an Arab boyfriend)

Woman: Ay ganun ba? (Really?)

Flat-nosed Sheikha: Ay oo, ang Arabo ko sobrang yaman sunod lahat ng layaw ko, me katulong pa kami sa bahay kaya buhay donya ako. (Yeah its true, my Arab boyfriend buys everything I want. We even have maids at home so I live like a queen.)

Woman: bwenas mo naman (You're so lucky)

Flat-nosed Sheikha: Korek! Ang Arabo ko bumili ng LIXOS (Lexus), ang ganda ganda, ang sarap sumakay. Tapos ang ganda pa ng flat namin 3 bedroom centralized A/C...etc..etc..yabang...yabang..yabang..Kaya kung ako sayo kabayan magisip isip ka, hindi ka yayaman ng kakatrabaho dito. (That's true, My Arab bought a Lexus and its so beautiful, it so nice to ride into. And we have a 3 bedroom flat which is so beautiful and its a centralized A/C one...etc..etc..brag..brag..brag..if I were you, better be smart and get yourself one too.)

At this point the woman is already irritated because the flat-nosed Sheikah made her feel that she is better than everyone else.

Woman: Sabagay, kasal na ba kayo? (You have a point, are you guys married?)

Flat-nosed Sheikha: Hindi, kasi me asawa rin siyang Araba. Pero ok lang basta binibigay niya lahat ng gusto ko. (nope, because he has an Arab wife. anyway its fine since he gives everything I want.)

Woman: Ah ganun (antipatika tone) (Ah ok {with a sarcastic tone})

Watch out for more tales of our Flat-Nosed Sheikhas.
Always remember the Kabit knows best...Ay ang Arabo ko!

Glossary

Flat-nosed Sheikha: A Filipina married or engaged or in relation or having an affair with an Arab guy who thinks she is better that everyone else especially to her compatriots. One who manage to 'succeed' in the Gulf and now enslaving her fellow Filipinos because of greed. One can be spotted in parties, Philippines Embassy/Consulate and major malls in Dubai. Be warned, the Flat-nosed Sheikha is 'mas maarte pa' than the local women...hence the expression Feeling Sheikha!


Nomads of the Orient

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Hundred of years ago a good number of Asians braved the rough seas in search for greaner pastures. Armed with their goods and trading skills they landed in the beautiful achipelago. For most of them its was just business, just temporary, a staging point. But the sheer beauty of the islands captivated them. And so a community of mix race and culture living harmoniously made what is the Pearl of the Orient today. The Nomads found their promise land. The Nomads ironically settled down at one place.

At present the Nomads are braving again the rough seas in search of a better life. Majority of them landed in the golden sands of Arabia. Working in under the punishing heat and desert chills. These Nomads were driven out from their paradise that was pillaged by a number of invaders disguised as saviour of souls, bringer of good fortune and teachers of infinite knowledge. As result the once euthopia of the orient is now a banana republic of warring religious beliefs, unstable political system and corruption to the highest level of governmet.

And so here we are, the Nomads of the Orient, leaving our promise land armed with hope and dreams. We hope that our travel is just temporary, and the country we land is will just be a stop over. We dream that the Pearl of the Orient would regain its sparkle and charm.


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Our Wish List

0 comments

1. A decent and useful Digital Camera will do. For us to post pictures of interest.
2. A hosting plan with a domain name to host future and existing websites hosted free elsewhere.
3. a WordPress blog...in the future..(lacks of income to host on a website that meets the requirements of Wordpress, don't want to try on freehosting and it's waste of time)
4. Pondering still...any token of appreciation is enough.


Thanks


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